Change.

​​New Years resolutions tend to get a bad name, mostly because no one actually keeps them. There is nothing wrong with trying to better ourselves. The problem is, we sometimes set ourselves up for failure, without even realizing it. It's a difficult task balancing the realistic with the unrealistic. For the past three years I've always made the resolution that I was going to be better than the year before..and for the most part, I succeeded.

I spent the end of 2017 and the first week in 2018 reflecting on my self, my life, and the future I want to create. Last year was a good year for me in certain aspects, but in some ways, I let myself down a lot. I started this journey about 3 years ago with the mindset that if I ate a certain way, and exercised as much as I could that the end result would lead me to happiness. By then end of 2016 I had lost quite a bit of weight, and looked the best that I ever had in my adult life, but I still wasn't happy.

I​​n the beginning of 2017, I got married, got accepted into grad school, moved on from the home I lived in my whole life, and started this "adulting" thing. In the middle of 2017, I was featured on every major social media news site in multiple countries where I was able to share my story with millions of people. Thousands responded to my story in a way I never imagined it could. For many, I was the motivation needed to start something they were once afraid of, I was the "hope" they needed to get their lives back on track. All those things that happened to me in 2017, that was happiness...and it's funny, because none of it had to do with the way I looked. 2017 was definitely a year of happiness for me, and it's one I don't think I'll ever forget.

There are also a lot of bad things...or choices made last year. I am still a firm believer that the best form of self love is taking care of yourself. Taking care of yourself can mean a large amount of things, including eating the right foods, drinking lots of water and exercising. About half way through last year my eating habits went down hill, I just had surgery on my hand so yoga was a struggle, the gym was a struggle, everything that I once strictly lived by just became a struggle. Because of all the bad choices, I started feeling the effects. I gained a little bit of weight back, my body started hurting in places it never hurt before (back pain is no joke guys, lol), I didn't want to back track to where I started, so I decided to make the change before I let my goals go completely.

I've learned a lot in the past few years, and I now know what I need to do, and what I don't need to do. I've learned that you don't have to deprive yourself from happy moments to be healthier. You don't have to exercise for 4 hours every day and live off of salad for each meal. I've learned balance. There has to be balance in anything you do in life, especially if you plan on doing it for ever. There will be no more falling into one extreme or the other. Weight loss is still very high on my list, but I've also got a few more things listed...and that just fine with me.